Protecting Our Asses

"A proposed law currently making its way through the Florida legislature might help you with what can be an embarrassing problem. Here’s the bottom line, the bill would be a mandate that all eating establishment must have enough toilet paper when you go into the restroom. The only problem is the bill doesn’t dictate how much toilet paper is “enough.” State Senator Victor Crist, a Republican from Tampa, felt the problem was so important, a law must be passed to protect the backsides of anyone in Florida. The measure will also try to regulate the cleanliness of restrooms in eating establishments."

I'm not quite sure what to say here. I'm not sure if the bigger problem is that the Florida State Legislature has nothing BETTER to do than this or that there is apparently a shortage (or poor distribution/organization of) toilet paper in the state of Florida. Who knew? Is this problem unique to Floridians? Do we use so much more toilet paper per capita that "eating establishments" actually RUN OUT without knowing? Where does the toilet paper go? Is the average Floridian ass larger than, say, the average Connecticut ass? What about Boston asses?These are all fine questions for the Legislature to answer though I wish they would answer them on their own time, perhaps with some field research.